The Life Doctor

fear

Out of Control

As my heart raced I clenched my fists trying to control the incoming panic attack which was threatening to take me over. I could feel my skin becoming hot and prickly and the knot in my gut get hard and bigger as a I tried not to think about how weird I must look to everyone stood around me. What was the problem? I was only in a pub with friends so why the anxiety? God I am going mad, like really mad. It didn’t make any sense at all ...

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I’m not good Enough

“I'm not good enough.” “Everyone is better than me.” “Why is everyone else more confident than me?” I think it’s easier for our self worth to take a battering now than maybe any other time in our history. We are bombarded with so many altered airbrushed images of perfection which distorts a realistic perception of reality. Social media and television keeps showing us people who are apparently living “that dream life,” and we will naturally compare ourselves with what we see and this can make us feel very bad indeed.  As most people ...

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Limbic Training

It’s easy to see why people will do anything not to feel any negative or uncomfortable feelings.  It doesn’t feel nice and as we are creatures of comfort the natural reactive response is to try and distract ourselves with something which does feel good. Food, alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, television and gaming are just a few ways people will use to try to move away from their thoughts which create negative feelings. The problem with this is that the Limbic System is now being trained to see negative thoughts and feelings as ...

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Goal Setting Doesn’t Work

“You need goals,” we are all told if we want to achieve or be more successful in life. “Without goals you will fail.”   The answer to life seems to be goal setting but why are we so terrible at reaching our goals? Then logical reasoning suggests “you need more motivation, discipline and focus to make goals work.”  So the next goal seems to be trying to make yourself kind of perfect so you can reach your desired goals.  This is a horrible trap to get caught up in which can ...

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Top 5 Mistakes with Anxiety

Here are the top 5 mistakes people make with anxiety: 1. Trying to fight it 2. Trying to distract yourself from it 3. Trying hard to get rid of it 4. Having a go at yourself about it 5. Feeling guilty for having it The reality is this, we all need anxiety, it's there to help us stay one step ahead of life which can be cruel and challenging.  Learning to change your relationship with it will help reduce the power it has which inhibits your life and help motivate you to make better choices and ...

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Stop Smoking Now

Ok, let’s do this, at present your mind is probably tricking you into believing you can’t stop smoking or at least will find it too difficult to let it go. Here are the facts: You could stop smoking right now and never smoke again. The mind though is brilliant at convincing you otherwise with very powerful illusions which feel very real. Like the Walking Dead you fall into a trance and believe them. You don’t enjoy smoking, anyone who says they do are literally letting their Smoking Zombie speak through them as if ...

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Personal Training

“I would never have thought about coming to see someone like you,” he said shuffling uncomfortably in the chair as he made his confession.  “I thought people who went to therapists were weak and just needed to pull their socks up.  Don’t get me wrong, I am still sceptical about what you whatever it is and don’t think you can really help, but I thought I would give it a go.” “What made you come to me then?” I asked. “Some of my friends who I thought were sorted admitted they had ...

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Crafty Perfection

“I just want to it to be perfect,” Carrie moaned.  “I want my book to not get these types of reviews!” I had looked at the reviews on Amazon and some people have been quite critical to say the least.  Carrie passed me some news clippings with reviews from various book critics, some of those were quite harsh too. Yet despite that her book was selling really well and had remained quite high in the book charts. “You want the book to be perfect?” I asked again. “Yes! I just want better reviews ...

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Ramblings On The Mind

Whatever you blame yourself for. Whatever you feel guilty about. Whatever you beat yourself up over. I want you to know something. It was not your fault. We don’t have freewill as proclaimed by some. Your brain evolved the way it has to keep you safer. Programmed by society, culture, parents and more. You are not in control of your thoughts. You are not in control of your feelings. No matter how much you think you should be None of us are no matter how we might seem to be. You do though have to take responsibility for what you think, say ...

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Personally Deluded

“I take everything so personally,” my new client said.  “Can you help me become more confident and not so paranoid when it comes to what people think of me?” “Do you think we are all judging you?” I asked. “Yeah, I am always wondering what people think of me and I worry that I am doing something wrong all the time. I know it’s not rational but I can’t help myself.” “ I bet you hate being criticised don’t you?” “Oh god yes, I can’t stand it, makes me feel really shit for days ...

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