The Life Doctor

therapy

Rebellion

It seems like we are always being told what to do. Parents, family and partners Teachers, bosses and peers Government, society, culture and religion Lay down some of rules we feel pressurised into obeying through the voice in our heads.  That inner critic, that inner moralist which not only can put us down with self abuse about the way we look and "not being good enough" but also demands reality fits our way of seeing the world or it gets very angry indeed. It gets exhausting listening to this voice, in the end we can ...

[Read more]

Wake Up to Self Sabotage

It’s that time of year for a life change as the New Year brings in a symbolic fresh slate yet most of you know that despite best intentions you will give up, not bother and simply avoid what you really would like to get done. Logically and frustratingly you should have no problem getting some of the most common life change people want to make right now. From going to the gym, eating healthier, stopping smoking, job hunting, cleaning out that back room or starting and finishing a life changing project ...

[Read more]

Stoptober Success!

Stoptober is here again and for many of you your minds will lie to you in order to get you smoking again after a few hours or days of trying to say goodbye to cigarettes.  The reason it will do this is because of “better the devil you know,” in other words the habit feels better than the risks of cravings, failing, gaining weight or any other negatives it’s predicting. The illusion is being safer keeping the habit, when you know deep down that it’s not safer at all. Here is ...

[Read more]

Faking Perfection

“I feel worthless.” “Everyone is better than me.” “Why is everyone else more confident than me?” I think it’s easier to feel more worthless now than maybe any other time in our history. We are bombarded with so many altered airbrushed images of perfection which distorts a realistic perception of reality. Social media and television keeps showing us people who are apparently living “that dream life,” and we will naturally compare ourselves with what we see and this can make us feel very bad indeed.  As most people wear masks hiding their inner ...

[Read more]

Top 5 Mistakes with Anxiety

Here are the top 5 mistakes people make with anxiety: 1. Trying to fight it 2. Trying to distract yourself from it 3. Trying hard to get rid of it 4. Having a go at yourself about it 5. Feeling guilty for having it The reality is this, we all need anxiety, it's there to help us stay one step ahead of life which can be cruel and challenging.  Learning to change your relationship with it will help reduce the power it has which inhibits your life and help motivate you to make better choices and ...

[Read more]

Personal Training

“I would never have thought about coming to see someone like you,” he said shuffling uncomfortably in the chair as he made his confession.  “I thought people who went to therapists were weak and just needed to pull their socks up.  Don’t get me wrong, I am still sceptical about what you whatever it is and don’t think you can really help, but I thought I would give it a go.” “What made you come to me then?” I asked. “Some of my friends who I thought were sorted admitted they had ...

[Read more]

Crafty Perfection

“I just want to it to be perfect,” Carrie moaned.  “I want my book to not get these types of reviews!” I had looked at the reviews on Amazon and some people have been quite critical to say the least.  Carrie passed me some news clippings with reviews from various book critics, some of those were quite harsh too. Yet despite that her book was selling really well and had remained quite high in the book charts. “You want the book to be perfect?” I asked again. “Yes! I just want better reviews ...

[Read more]

Ramblings On The Mind

Whatever you blame yourself for. Whatever you feel guilty about. Whatever you beat yourself up over. I want you to know something. It was not your fault. We don’t have freewill as proclaimed by some. Your brain evolved the way it has to keep you safer. Programmed by society, culture, parents and more. You are not in control of your thoughts. You are not in control of your feelings. No matter how much you think you should be None of us are no matter how we might seem to be. You do though have to take responsibility for what you think, say ...

[Read more]

Personally Deluded

“I take everything so personally,” my new client said.  “Can you help me become more confident and not so paranoid when it comes to what people think of me?” “Do you think we are all judging you?” I asked. “Yeah, I am always wondering what people think of me and I worry that I am doing something wrong all the time. I know it’s not rational but I can’t help myself.” “ I bet you hate being criticised don’t you?” “Oh god yes, I can’t stand it, makes me feel really shit for days ...

[Read more]

Getting over Yourself

Let’s make it quite clear even though it may seem a little harsh at first. Not many if any are that interested in you.  So if you do happen to be in any social situation which you feel we are all watching and judging you, the likely hood is we are not.  We are like you mostly lost in our own little bubbles of reality thinking about all sorts of things, we will not really be thinking about you. If by any chance you catch our attention and notice you we will ...

[Read more]