The Life Doctor

self worth

Top 5 Mistakes with Anxiety

Here are the top 5 mistakes people make with anxiety: 1. Trying to fight it 2. Trying to distract yourself from it 3. Trying hard to get rid of it 4. Having a go at yourself about it 5. Feeling guilty for having it The reality is this, we all need anxiety, it's there to help us stay one step ahead of life which can be cruel and challenging.  Learning to change your relationship with it will help reduce the power it has which inhibits your life and help motivate you to make better choices and ...

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Personal Training

“I would never have thought about coming to see someone like you,” he said shuffling uncomfortably in the chair as he made his confession.  “I thought people who went to therapists were weak and just needed to pull their socks up.  Don’t get me wrong, I am still sceptical about what you whatever it is and don’t think you can really help, but I thought I would give it a go.” “What made you come to me then?” I asked. “Some of my friends who I thought were sorted admitted they had ...

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Crafty Perfection

“I just want to it to be perfect,” Carrie moaned.  “I want my book to not get these types of reviews!” I had looked at the reviews on Amazon and some people have been quite critical to say the least.  Carrie passed me some news clippings with reviews from various book critics, some of those were quite harsh too. Yet despite that her book was selling really well and had remained quite high in the book charts. “You want the book to be perfect?” I asked again. “Yes! I just want better reviews ...

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Ramblings On The Mind

Whatever you blame yourself for. Whatever you feel guilty about. Whatever you beat yourself up over. I want you to know something. It was not your fault. We don’t have freewill as proclaimed by some. Your brain evolved the way it has to keep you safer. Programmed by society, culture, parents and more. You are not in control of your thoughts. You are not in control of your feelings. No matter how much you think you should be None of us are no matter how we might seem to be. You do though have to take responsibility for what you think, say ...

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Personally Deluded

“I take everything so personally,” my new client said.  “Can you help me become more confident and not so paranoid when it comes to what people think of me?” “Do you think we are all judging you?” I asked. “Yeah, I am always wondering what people think of me and I worry that I am doing something wrong all the time. I know it’s not rational but I can’t help myself.” “ I bet you hate being criticised don’t you?” “Oh god yes, I can’t stand it, makes me feel really shit for days ...

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Proud

I didn’t see them all picking up rocks behind my back as I walked with a gang of “friends” to an isolated field.  As the circle formed around me and the rocks were held ready I should have seen what was coming next. The word “run,” from one lad should have been a clue but my confusion at how it went from all friendly to this made me freeze on the spot like a rabbit caught in the headlights.  “Fucking queer,” came next as the first stones hit me hard, ...

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Getting over Yourself

Let’s make it quite clear even though it may seem a little harsh at first. Not many if any are that interested in you.  So if you do happen to be in any social situation which you feel we are all watching and judging you, the likely hood is we are not.  We are like you mostly lost in our own little bubbles of reality thinking about all sorts of things, we will not really be thinking about you. If by any chance you catch our attention and notice you we will ...

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The Power of Yes

The word NO has quite a devastating effect on the mind.  (Apologies for what reading this word has done to you).  This powerful word when spoken, thought about or read releases dozens of stress producing chemicals in the brain which effect the effectiveness and rationality of the brain. So is it little wonder that many people fail in changing their lives by using the word NO to try and stop themselves thinking or doing things which are holding back their lives? NO feels quite horrible to have to say doesn’t it? For ...

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I’m not Good Enough

“Phew I’m tired..maybe I should slow down, I wish this run was over, I don’t think I can do this, how long is left to go?” My first run after a few weeks break is always a tough one and my negative thoughts inner dialogue can go a little crazy. It likes to speed up and get louder so I act now on what it says. But why should I? Thoughts are just thoughts...they are not even real so why believe what they say? The problem most people have is that they believe ...

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Anger, Stress and Anxiety Management

One thing some clients are surprised by is how angry they come across, the anger within influenced their thoughts and  behaviours and they just accepted this as part of their normal behaviour. They often wonder what other peoples problems are with them.  They can also get stuck in the “this is me” trap where they just assume their provocative, self opinionated, reactive and defensive nature was just “who they are.” They had originally come to see me to have their anxiety or lack of confidence worked with as that is what ...

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